To Work or Not to Work

Anything that does not bring you alive is too small for you.

David Whyte

I received an email from one of my brides this morning--a delightful gal named Jocelyn who is currently at Harvard Law School and coming home to Colorado to be wed by yours truly in July. We're trying to set up a meeting to write her ceremony this month, as she will be in town for the holidays. In trying to juggle her busy schedule, she requested a meeting with me on the 27th or 28th of December, asking me if I "worked" on those days (i.e. so close to Christmas).

I was touched by her consideration of my time, but must admit, the question puzzled me a little, for I seldom "work" at wedding-related activity. Webster defines work as "exertion or effort directed to produce or accomplish something; labor; toil." While the "accomplishment of something" part does appeal to me, the rest of the definition does not sound like something I want to do day in and day out. In fact, I try to avoid it as much as possible. I joyously wrote her back, laughingly explaining that I don't "work" when I write or perform ceremonies. I play, I create, I get inspired and I laugh on a daily basis and would be happy to do any and all of these things with her on the 27th or 28th of this month!

It called to mind a conversation I overheard recently at a restaurant where a group of women was listening to another gal exclaiming over the "benefits" of her workplace (there's that word again). The ladies were all abuzz, oohing and ahhing over two weeks paid vacation in the first year, health insurance, a supervisor magnanimous enough to allow the employee to leave 30 minutes early to attend a holiday party and loans from the employer to purchase personal computers. Wow! Talk about a different perspective! For me, the benefits of my "work" (if I called it that) that come immediately to mind are things like avoiding the morning commute, never having to shop on weekends, hiking in the mountains on a Thursday, taking off for a trip to Spain with the love of my life without asking any one's permission(which I am doing in January), and being able to throw in a load of laundry in between tasks. (Try telling your boss that you are running home to separate your whites from your colors and see how long you last!) Multi-tasking for the self-employed person means soaking in a hot bubble bath while you read your industry-related publications, or better yet--a novel or something inspirational. No, no....not work at all!

My purpose here is not to gloat, although I do admit to a tremendous sense of self-satisfaction on snowy mornings as I hear the spinning of tires outside of my window during the morning commute to (you guessed it) work! It is however, to get you to think a bit about the quality of the time you invest in an effort to keep a roof over your head and food in your belly. We all get the same 168 hours per week--shouldn't that which you do for most of that time be spent doing something that is the opposite of "toil"?